By Robin Prior, Mike Leibling
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Extra resources for Coaching Made Easy: Step-By-Step Techniques That Get Results
If you believe that people with red hair are dishonest you will notice people with red hair being dishonest and have a lower awareness of redheaded people behaving honestly. Think of a time when you had a new car or a new piece of clothing. Suddenly you noticed how such cars and such clothing were everywhere. This is because your filters had changed and your antennae were tuned into the frequency of this car and that clothing. When coaching, remember that the client’s view of the world is different from yours.
That I got a raise, as I think I’m doing a good job, but I’m being a bit exploited at the moment. A11 What were you finding difficult? What were the difficulties? Er, speaking up for myself, because I was afraid my boss might lay me off. Um, talking about this with anyone, in case I looked stupid. A12 What skills were you missing? What skills were missing? Knowing how to speak up for myself without making things worse. That’s it. A13 What information were you missing? What information was missing?
They come in two categories – the useful and the no longer useful. The useful These can be very useful and they come without any feelings of doubt. ‘You shouldn’t put your hand in the fire’ is a belief that many of us inherit and accept without having to validate by putting our hand in the fire. Even when we grow and go through our stage of experimentation and validation by touching a flame, we can acknowledge the usefulness of the belief our parents have given us and retain it. Examples: ‘Useful’ We shouldn’t put our hand in the fire, if we are to avoid burns.